


Carmine Roses

by BubblegumDays



Series: ActuallyOddPlan One-Shots (ORIGINAL) [3]
Category: DanPlan, actuallyoddplan
Genre: Angst, Blood, Car Accidents, Character Death, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Read tags, if anyone in actuallyoddplan sees this and is uncomfortable i will take it down, major trigger warning, only added dp tag so its easier to find, valentines fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-12 18:02:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22720198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BubblegumDays/pseuds/BubblegumDays
Summary: Stephen takes Hosuh on a date where he plans to confess his feelings- but things don't go quite as planned.
Relationships: Hosuh Lee & Stephen Ng, Hosuh Lee/Stephen Ng
Series: ActuallyOddPlan One-Shots (ORIGINAL) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1633504
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	Carmine Roses

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: By no means do I intend to romanticise anything. This is a piece of fiction about the personas created by Stephen and Hosuh and is not an accurate reflection of them as actual people.
> 
> I don't even really celebrate valentines, it's a capitalist scam so the big man can make a quick buck, and honestly, this could've worked without that element but whatever, we're already here now so have some angst.

The road ahead was clear, metaphorically and literally as the car drove down the not so open but reasonably vacant tarmac, inhabitants for the most part remaining in a comfortable silence other than the song playing on the radio.

It was a familiar tune, something that seemed strangely reminiscent of hazy memories of grass stains and orange juice to the boy in the passenger seat, tapping vaguely along on the dashboard, unaware of the crimson roses tucked away in the glove compartment by the other before he'd climbed in.

Trees and shrubbery passed in an obscure blur of greens and browns, contrasting with the almost vivid cerulean sky, hue mirrored in a slightly paler tone by the eyes that glanced briefly over to the figure sitting in the driver's seat, lingering for a moment longer than could simply be brushed off as curiosity but looking away when he noticed.

Of course, Stephen didn't question it too much, already too caught up in his own plans and worries for when they arrived at their desired destination to even consider the possibility the slight rosy tint to his pale cheeks was caused by him.

Perhaps he too let his gaze wander, let his eyes focus on the figure sat content in his passenger seat staring out of the window wistfully rather than the road ahead, noting the way the mid-afternoon sunlight complimented his countenance like something from an indie short film rather than the upcoming intersection and the red light it clearly displayed.

"Stephen?" Maybe he heard the concerned appeal a little too late, and by the time he even registered what was happening it was already occurring and he was helpless against it as everything went to static and all that cut through was Hosuhs voice at an octave he never wanted to hear it in.

He wasn't sure whether he'd simply blacked out or locked the memories away the second they occurred, but the next thing he recalled other than survival instincts and screaming was the pain in his skull and the taste of blood.

It was all still hazy, and he was pretty sure he'd broken a bone or two judging by the pain in his leg and it's refusal to do much, but his own health didn't matter nearly as much as it should've as he frantically searched for the one he'd been so deeply infatuated with that he could've killed them both.

He found him pretty much exactly where he'd been before, but not in a state he ever wanted to see him in, limp against his seat with a deep wine red reminiscent of the flowers that he'd most likely never receive sloping down from some kind of gash that'd thankfully been mostly obscured by his soiled hair.

"H-Hosuh...?" He choked despite the pain it caused, pulling himself closer in defiance of his entire body telling him to curl up and hope the agony would dissipate, gently taking his hand in his own and holding it as tightly as he could, which given the circumstances, wasn't very firm.

There was a shaky breath from the boy in question, barely there and fading fast, eyes cracking open just enough for him to see just how glassy and dim they'd become. Just how close to death he was "Stephen..."

"I-I'm so sorry Hos- I didn't mean to..." Of course he hadn't meant to, but Hosuh was too far gone to even care too much for whose fault it was. Stephen was already sobbing, speech pattern frantic and eyes blown wide with a consternation he couldn't quite conceal "We're gonna be okay- Just, hold on Hos, please... I-I can't lose you..."

Hosuh shushed him softly, unbelievably calm considering their circumstances, smiling faintly up at him. A different smile from the one he'd worn while staring out of the window at the world he might never get to see again, holding the expected elements of torment and strain but still retaining something heartbreakingly earnest.

"Stephen... I have something to tell you..." He sounded as if he already knew he wasn't going to make it and this could quite possibly be the last thing he ever vocalises before the inevitable occurs, voice gentle and accepting of his fate "I-I love you..."

"I-" Stephen started but was quickly cut short by his own hesitance and a sob from both terror and discomfort, vocal cords failing him "I love you too..."

The wail of distant but swiftly approaching ambulance sirens meant nothing as Hosuh went limp, hand losing any grip it may have once retained from a life cut short by irresponsibility as he let out his last faint breath, face no longer contorted in agony, more redolent of contentment.

Maybe it was the head trauma finally taking a proper toll over him, but Stephen swore he saw a halo flickering over his bloodied head.

\----------

A year passed in a numb haze, finding himself standing in front of a not yet very weather-worn headstone on a strikingly familiar mid-February afternoon, clutching a bouquet of blood-red roses as if wishing hard enough could bring the boy who now rested 6 feet under back to life.

"_In memory of Hosuh Lee_." The inscription read, frigid and robotic in a way that never failed to irk Stephen for reasons that were mostly derived from the guilt he carried for getting him here in the first place "_7th December 1995 - 14th February 2020_."

"Happy valentines day, Hos..." He sniffled, stifling a sob due to currently being in such a public place despite the only others present being a woman and her dog on the other side of the premises, setting down the roses beside a faded photo of Hosuh left by his relatives "I'm so sorry... You didn't deserve to die..."

"And I know there's nothing I can do to bring you back and I'm just talking to myself," Stephen could still recall his last moments, still remember the uncanny steadiness of his voice and how much the guilt still ate at him for it "But I still love you... And I don't think I'll ever stop loving you..."

No one was quite sure how or when it'd happened, just like how Stephen had never fully recollected the events that transpired during the peak of that day one year prior to the ones that were to take place today.

But his body was found eerily still and pale beside his grave by a passerby who immediately contacted the police after finding that he was well and truly dead.

In truth, there were people who knew how it'd happened, namely the police and doctors who'd performed the autopsy, but anything more than 'Stephen is dead' was kept out of the public eye as if it were a filthy secret when really no one close to him could bring themselves to accept it enough to talk about it without breaking down.

It'd been the same with Hosuh, and now two headstones sat side by side, together in death rather than growing old together just as they'd both secretly dreamed.

**Author's Note:**

> I swear I haven't actually written much in months and I kinda just banged this whole thing out in under 24 hours (this had a draft as well, like bruh, how did I even, I'm slow as fuck-)
> 
> There are probably so many mistakes tho, ew.


End file.
